I am thinking to write to apply for a job but I don't think I have enough convincing experience to write since I am a freshie. Therefore, I choose to write an application letter to NUSSU Welfare PR Feedback, although I don't have to in practice. There isn't any advertisement in written form because they actually sent me information through e-mails, which I consider not very appropriate to show in this blog.
Application Letter
Subject Title: Application for complier of NUSSU Welfare PR Feedback
Septermber 5, 2010
Ms. Katie TEY Soo Kiat,
PR Feedback Project Director
NUSSU Welfare Committee AY2010/2011
National University of Singapore
Dear Ms.Tey,
I am very glad to know that I have passed the first-round interview and been invited to join NUSSU Welfare Public Relation Feedback. I am very interested in the complier position you offer this year because I have quite a few experience related with designing and publications.
As you have indicated in your e-mail, you need someone who has the passion and skills to build an effective communication between NUSSU Welfare and our students. Fortunately, I have involved in such kind of activities before because I have been in charge of publication and advertisement board for my class in high school. During the two years, I have learned to design beautiful patterns and images on the display board. I have also managed to listen for my classmates’ ideas and provide effective feedbacks to them. I think these two skills are the ones that you are looking for so that NUSSU Welfare could let our students benefit more.
Besides my old experience, I have always been trying to challenge myself and acquiring new skills. I worked on Penguin Project a year ago. In this project, we wrote our own script and designed all the props and settings. I was the person who chose the music, selected the background pictures and used hardboard to make a gravestone and a vase! Moreover, I have joined a Photoshop workshop organized by CDTL in NUS recently and I hope that I can do my designs in a more advanced way.
Thank you very much for your time and consideration. I have attached a copy of my resume, which could provide my additional information. Please feel free to contact me and I am looking forward to hearing from you soon.
Yours Sincerely,
Yu Xian
10th Kent Ridge Drive
119242
(+65) 9xxxxxxx
xxxxxxxx@nus.edu.sg
HI Cosine
ReplyDeleteCongratulation for clearing the first round of selection.
I think this application letter is very well structured.
Here are two comments I have:
1)give examples on lessons you have learned from previous and how you can relate it to the position you are applying.
2)You do not need to rehash on your experiences since it is all stated in the resume.
Hope that helps.
Nan
2)
Hi Cosine!
ReplyDeleteI would like to comment on this sentence: I was the person who chose the music, selected the background pictures and used hardboard to make a gravestone and a vase!
If I recall correctly, application letters need to be in formal tone. This belongs to the 'correctness' of the 7C's. The above sentence does not sound formal to me. (But I might be wrong though.) What do you think, Cosine?
Hi Cosine!
ReplyDeleteYour letter is generally well structured.
However, you should focus more on what you can contribute instead of stating what you had done before as this information will be in your resume.
I would like to comment on this sentence, "Besides my old experience, I have always been trying to challenge myself and acquiring new skills." Previous experiences will work better in this case.
=D See you around!
Hi Cosine!
ReplyDeleteGenerally, i think that this is a well-written application letter. However, i think that you dwell too much on description on what you have done (which can be included in resume). I think you need to highlight what you can contribute instead.
For example, say, having background in photoshop, I can design attractive banners and publication posters for NUSSU events.
Just some idea from me. I hope they are appropriate. =)
Hi guys,
ReplyDeleteI think you are all correct. I fail to point out how I can contribute to NUSSU Welfare and I will try to improve it.
Thank you very much for your advice!!
Hi Yong Feng,
ReplyDeleteI think this sentence is indeed informal. Thank you for pointing it out. :)